well okay let’s say someone comes to you and they say I am really having an issue with anger there’s nothing major going on in terms of like one incident that’s making me so angry but rather I’m finding myself quick-tempered and I’m angry about a lot like I’m angry at the person who cut me off in traffic I’m angry at the grocery store attendant for not you know like moving along fast enough I’m angry at my husband I’m angry at my kids and I’m just I don’t want to be an angry person but my actions are making me add up to be an angry person
my mind in rigorous honesty is going to think in that moment and and hypothesize and not lead with this but in my mind will think I wonder if this person is in the victim triangle they have a victim murder mentality I do not judge them for that and with that if they’re in this triangle of the victim triangle they will be as a victim and they’ll need God or somebody else to rescue them or they’ll make people their persecutor or what we call perpetrator so I want to I would think I I’m contemplating I wonder if they’re in that victim martyr place
you know everything’s after me this is not right lots of injustices in the world were breaking news the world right now is filled with injustices it’s going to be that way for a while it’s been probably been that way for a while already so then I want to interview the anger I’ll tell that person one example you’ve seen it uh where I would say let’s just have for a moment bring out a chair in my office an empty chair right a 3×5 ctis say anger in it disappointment what have you and so I would let’s interview that anger and you
come sit in this chair it’s so easy it’s an experiential thing and say you become anger to let me interview you anger how long have you been pris in Bill’s life and tell me so long the time uh what were some three things you were angry about in childhood and just don’t edit if it comes to their mind they say it and say now let’s go to current what’s going on right now is there anything anger that you see with Bill let’s say that’s out of alignment yeah he knows he’s overworking he has some disappointments he doesn’t want to face
