You Were Enough Before Anyone Said “I Do”

The pursuit of identity and worth often leads individuals to seek validation in titles, roles, or relationships. However, the sources emphasize that true, unwavering worth is established at creation, long “before anyone said, ‘I do.'” Understanding this royal identity—being children of the King—is the foundation for healthy, fulfilling relationships, especially marriage.

This summary explores the profound dignity inherent in humanity’s creation, the true nature of marriage covenants, and the essential difference between a difficult and a destructive relationship, focusing on the necessity of true repentance.

Your Royal Identity: Created in God’s Image and Likeness

The creation story, particularly Genesis 1:26–27, establishes that the creation of man and woman is the “cherry on top” or the “star on top” of God’s work. This status confers immediate, permanent dignity.

• Image and Likeness (Status): God said, “Let us make man in our image according to our likeness”. These Hebrew words, tselem and demut, were used in the ancient Near Eastern world specifically to identify the royal children of the king.
• Universal Dignity: The scripture confirms that both man and woman share the image and likeness of God. This means humanity was created with dignity, worth, and honor.
• Children of the King: The creation story is an invitation to understand that humanity is not just subjects of a distant God, but are actually His children.

This divine status, which is freely given to all of humanity, is permanent and remains unbroken even after the Fall.

The Man and Woman: Complementary Pillars of Stability

The source text offers a nuanced understanding of how man and woman were created to function together, emphasizing complementarity rather than simple subordination.

• Woman from the “Side” (Tsela): While the familiar understanding is that woman came from Adam’s rib, the Hebrew word (tsela) used in Genesis is fascinating because it is never used throughout the rest of the Old Testament to describe a rib.
• Pillars of Stability: Tsela refers to the side of a structure or the pillars of stability of the temple.
• Complementary Function: This detail suggests that the man serves in some way as a structure, but the woman serves as the pillar and the foundation. This demonstrates the beauty and brilliance of God in creating complementary relationships where both man and woman have a distinct purpose and function. If the pillars collapse, the building collapses; if there is structure but no pillars, a threat (like a tornado) brings destruction.

Image, Standard, and the Necessity of Jesus

While the image of God remains humanity’s permanent status, the standard required to live up to that status has been broken by the Fall.

• Status vs. Standard: The image of God is both a status (freely given) and a standard (the requirements for living that status out).
• Human Brokenness: Because of the Fall, humanity is broken and is “no longer able to live up to that standard”.
• The Role of Christ: This brokenness highlights the necessity for Jesus and the equipping work of the Holy Spirit for those who submit to Christ.

Marriage: A Covenant Witnessed by God

When two image-bearers enter into marriage, they are entering a relationship that requires significant work and responsibility from both sides. The source emphasizes the need for precision when discussing the nature of this commitment.

• Contract with a Witness: The covenant made in marriage (Hebrew: berith) is a contract. This covenant relationship is between a man and a woman, not directly with God.
• The Role of God: God is the Judge who is the witness of the covenant. This makes the contract extremely weighty, as it is made in front of a holy and righteous God.
• Identity First: It is vital for both partners to remember that their primary title—child of God, made in the likeness and image—carries more importance than the title of husband or wife. Marriage does not negate the believer’s prior identity as an image-bearer.

Distinguishing Difficult from Destructive Marriages

When a relationship faces serious breakdown, it is essential to distinguish between a difficult marriage and a destructive marriage. This distinction often rests on the presence or absence of true repentance.

• Destructive Behavior: Destructive actions include alcoholism, pornography addiction, unfaithfulness, adultery, and physical abuse.
• God’s Response: Considering God anthropomorphically (with human-like emotions), the sources suggest that God, as a good Father who gave humanity His image, would respond to the betrayal and destructive behavior between partners.
• Repentance is Key: A single mistake is different from a destructive pattern. The critical factor is whether the destructive partner is repentant—not just sorry they were caught, but deeply sorry for the action and its impact on their spouse.