How to Treat One Another

Dr. Charles Stanley asserts that life is fundamentally about relationships. Relationships—with family, friends, co-workers, strangers, and most importantly, God—are essential. Without meaningful relationships, life is reduced to material and secular pursuits that are ultimately meaningless. Relationships determine whether a person experiences true happiness and peace.

Stanley argues that strong relationships are vital in every facet of life, including business, family, and interactions with children. He presents the foundational principle for building these relationships, given by Jesus in the Sermon on the Mount: The Golden Rule.

The Command: Treat People the Way You Want to Be Treated

The basis for strong, godly relationships is found in Matthew 7:12: “In everything, therefore, treat the people the same way you want them to treat you. This is the Law and the Prophets”.

Key Aspects of the Command:

• Universality (“In Everything”): This command applies to “everything”—not just some things or when it is convenient.
• Total Inclusion (“Treat People”): The command applies to everyone (“people”). A believer cannot “pick and choose” who they will obey God by treating well.
• The Command of Jesus: This is a direct command from Jesus Christ. Disobeying this principle means being disobedient to Jesus.
• Reveals God’s Heart: This command is a principle that reveals the very heart of God, showing how He thinks about us and how He wants us to treat one another.

Many people know how to quote this verse but fail to practice it. Stanley observes that people often rationalize away their failure to obey, especially when they feel they have been hurt or mistreated by others. However, the expectation of how we treat others is not based on what we feel, but on what Jesus commanded.

The Components of a Strong Relationship

To practically apply the Golden Rule and build the kind of strong relationships “that all of us need”, Stanley provides a list of character traits and actions that should be present:

• Enjoyable and Satisfying
• Loyalty
• Trust
• Mutual Interest
• Genuine Concern for the other person’s welfare, both today and in the future
• Desire to Please the other person (actively looking for ways to please them)
• Truthfulness (Lying, deception, and manipulation will destroy a relationship)
• Prayer (praying for one another by name and lifting up burdens)
• Desire the Best for one another
• Protection (protecting them from false accusations or physical harm)
• Forgiving (being very forgiving when one offends or is insensitive)
• Encouragement (being supportive during difficulties through calls, letters, or presence)
• Supportive (they should feel your support)
• Generous (not stingy or tight, but looking for ways to bring happiness and joy)
• Honor and Respect (accepting them just the way they are, without trying to change them)
• Love (above everything else)